The Intersection of Fatphobia, Misogynoir & Patriarchy: A Proper Dragging for Folks Coming for Lela Rochon

The BBW Slay
4 min readJul 24, 2019

July 24, 2019

In the year of our Lord 2019, folks are still out here blaming women for the wrongdoings of men. Troll, basura ass men and basic ass, “pick me" women are caping for this philandering, rhinoceros pizzle Antoine Fuqua using the rationale that Nicole “I Need to Apprehend My Life” Murphy is more attractive than Queen Lela Rochon due to her weight gain. Aight…I GOT TIME TUH-DAY!

In the words of Malcolm X, “Who taught you how to hate yourselves?” For purposes of this situation, we can’t blame wypipo (well…technically we can literally blame wypipo at all times because…slavery), we have to look to ourselves and our role in perpetuating patriarchy and misogynoir (hatred of black women). First of all, why are some of yall coming for Lela when she is 100% NOT at fault. Between thyroid issues and struggles with attempting to carry Mr. Dirtbag Fuqua’s baby, she just had more to love, mane. If we must proceed in dragging a woman in this fuckery triangle (cuz this shit ain’t love…its lust), it should be Ms. (cuz she ain’t got nan husband) Murphy. Save yo light skin ass tears, sis, and dem sorry ass excuses. Admit that you out here thottin and boppin and take this L gracefully. And to the women who are supporting this fake ass we’re just friends shit and “Lela let herself go", y’all just slaw af (“slaw" is an African American colloquial term originating from Memphis, TN used to describe people, places and things that are shitty, whack af, etc.).

Evidence of Slaw Ass Commentary

Sis…really?!?! Girl…YOU TRIED IT! You can be “overweight” and literally work out daily and have a healthy diet. I have always been a big girl--but even at my smallest which was a 12/14 I was still healthy af with a bomb ass diet and exercise regime. My mother, who is so damn fine, has both hypothyroidism and Hashimoto’s Disease which causes excessive weight gain. Additionally, a non-insured driver hit her in a near fatal car accident where her foot was detached causing her to have both metal plates and screws in her ankle forever. She also has heriditary arthritis as well. All of these unforeseen and irreversible conditions have altered her life. Even with all the effort she can muster, weight management will always be a substantial challenge. Also, why aren’t some of y’all holding Antione & Nicole hailing from Thotlandia accountable for their actions?!?! I believe the desecration of marriage outweighs (pun intended) any sentiment regarding physical appearance. Then why you gotta say “black” women. Girl…you trippin! Infidelity, patriarchy and toxic masculinity are issues that cross all racial boundaries. To specifically emphasize and generalize black women while looking at your ultra melanated ass pic, you further exacerbate misogynoir and self-hatred. I’m all for black women being healthy, but this type of rhetoric is both toxic and harmful. Furthermore, sis, to mask your fatphobia and misogynoir as a point of advice is straight basura. You are slaw as hell for this weak ass comment.

At the end of the day, folks got my sister queen Lela Rochon all the way messed up. The judgment, unpacking and think pieces regarding this issue should be reserved for men treating women as objects only valued for physical attributes. We cannot model to young girls and boys that women are disposable…especially black women!

The most disrespected person in America is the black woman. --Malcolm X

And this is not just to shade black women who have made deplorable ass comments, black men definitely had some nasty things to say as well. But it undeniably hurts more (at least in my opinion) when its fellow black women tearing you down. We are literally all we got, y’all! The entire concept of intersectionality was defined by a black woman (shout out to Kimberlé Williams Crenshaw) because of all the nuances of hatred and oppression that literally endanger our very existence. Don’t feed into the evils of pop culture that is rooted in anti-blackness, anti-women and anti-body positivity to stunt on social media. We have to know better and we have to do better…PERIODT! Sending love and light to Sister Lela Rochon.

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The BBW Slay

Written by & for Big, Beautiful & Black Queens, "The BBW Slay" is a body positive, intersectional blog packed with all the #BlackGirlMagic...PERIODT💋